A RECENT survey carried out in Ireland has found that an alarming
number of bedroom DJs are still convinced they’ll make it in the music
industry someday, despite never actually playing a live set or releasing
a track.
The survey, carried out by the online magazine 12Tens asked 20,000 self-confessed bedroom producers 40 questions relating to their future aspirations.
“What we found was astonishing,” 12Tens editor Harry Brady told WWN.
“Almost 90% of the people we asked were actually convinced they will
someday play in front of thousands of fans across the world. These
people are delusional and are in need of some form of help. They’re just
wasting their time”.
In Waterford alone, there are 8,789 bedroom DJs, many of whom are in
their late twenties and thirties. That figure equates to 1 out of every 4
men in the county.
The shocking news has forced the government into action, with
Taoiseach Enda Kenny calling for family members and friends of deranged
stay-at-home DJs to stage interventions in a bid to enlighten them from
their unrealistic musical dreams.
“We would ask people to not encourage them when they post sample
tracks online,” Mr. Kenny said in a brief statement in his home
constituency of Mayo. “Do not like, share or even play the track as this
can be taken up wrongly as appreciation”.
Following the survey results, 12Tens Magazine has issued several
telltale signs to look out for if you suspect a friend or family
member to be a bedroom DJ, or producer:
- Posting pictures of mixing desks, vinyl covers, turntables or monitors laden with music programs
- Badly named soundcloud or mixcloud links on various forms of social media
- Constantly debating and categorizing new forms of dance music
- Unz Unz Unz or Umph Umph Ump or Ins Ins Ins sounds emanating from their room
- Look out for terms like: Traktor, Reason and Fruit loops (all music programs)
- Check for Headphone marks around the ear and the upper head area
- Smug sense of music superiority
- Psychedelic Wall Posters
- A rather large collection of DJ equipment, taking up the majority of their bedroom (this one is probably the most telltale sign on the list)